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Can
you be friends and lovers?
Many
people say sex ruins a friendship. Frenchkiss
tells us the dangers of having, or not having sex with a friend.
----------------------------------------------------------------------------- By
Lynn See
[eastciti.com,
January 29, 2001]
It's a common misnomer that sex with a friend will ruin the friendship.
People
will tell you that though, to mind the danger of sexual involvement
with a friend of the opposite sex, sort of like advising that one
should not drink from the same cup as a sick person, as if it's
just a scientific fact, an undeniable truth, a law of nature that
it will ruin the health of the relationship.
But
I've gotten to the bottom of this quandary, and at the risk of sounding
like a hussy, here's what I've learnt.
I
went through my own "experimental" stage. And I'm only telling you
this as a way a listing my credentials.
I'm
neither proud nor ashamed of my actions, I don't regret what I learnt
and I always practiced safe sex. So here's the story:
I Slept With Twelve Men
In
the course of a year, I slept with 12 men. Each was a friend of
mine and most of those friends were also business associates.
Most
of the encounters took place while travelling on business; only
a few were actually invited into my bedroom (I'll sleep with a lot
of people, but you have to be pretty special to get invited to my
pad).
All
were repeat performers, that is to say, I had sex with each of these
men on several occasions, usually every weekend for a month or 2,
often overlapping with other lovers.
These
men were discrete and I was the one who decided when the interludes
happened, and I was the one who called them off.
To
this day, I am still dear friends with all of them. We meet for
coffee, trade e-mail, they introduce me to their girlfriends, we
invite each other to our parties. We are friends.
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